As a school leader, one of the first lessons I learned was to observe, listen, and understand the unique needs of my students. When I began conducting kindergarten walkabouts, I made a discovery that would forever change our approach to one of the most traditional aspects of school life: the parent-teacher conference. With conferences right around the corner, I thought this would be a great opportunity to share with you the changes that we made.

In just one kindergarten class, over nine students lived with their grandparents or great-grandparents. This reality wasn’t an isolated case; it represented a growing number of children across our school. What struck me was how the term “parent-teacher conference” felt increasingly out of place. It unintentionally excluded children who were being raised by extended family, and this was something I refused to ignore.

As school leaders, we have a responsibility to foster inclusion from the very first moment a child walks through our doors. 

The idea of "family" isn't bound by one definition, and our language should reflect that. This prompted me to make the change from "parent-teacher conferences" to "family conferences," and the results were profound. I discuss this and many other events that we changed in our 30 Day Jumpstart!!!!

The Impact of Changing to Family Conferences

Over the past few years, this seemingly small change had a ripple effect that reached every corner of our school community. The shift wasn't just about words—it was about redefining how we approach family engagement in a way that welcomes everyone.

98% Attendance Rate: In just our first year of shifting to family conferences, we saw an average of 98% in-person attendance at family conferences. This was a dramatic increase from previous years.

One Teacher’s Record-Breaking Year: One teacher, in particular, achieved a milestone that had never happened before in her five years at the school—100% attendance from families at conferences. This shift fostered deeper relationships between teachers and families, and allowed for open, honest conversations about the students’ progress.

Social Media and Child Care: To support this initiative, we heavily promoted it over social media and provided child care during conferences. By removing barriers, we ensured that more families could participate without worrying about logistics or feeling excluded due to outdated terminology.

Transportation: We also offered “taxi credits” for families who didn’t have transportation to attend. Why not? If you see a problem, there is ALWAYS a solution!

Overcoming Resistance

As the new principal, I was not without my challenges. Some staff initially resisted the change, not seeing the necessity of moving away from the term "parent-teacher." For many, it was a familiar and comfortable way of conducting conferences. But I knew this change was more than semantics—it was about making sure no child was outcast or left behind simply because their home life didn’t fit the “traditional” mold.

I believed, and still believe, that it is not a child's fault if they are not being raised in what society views as a "traditional" family. Schools are often the first place where children encounter structured learning and social interactions, and their first experience should reflect acceptance and inclusivity. Ultimately, we pushed forward because it was what was best for our kids.

Why Language Matters

This experience taught me the power of language in shaping school culture. Words can either include or exclude, and as leaders, we must be intentional about the messages we send to our students and families. 

By moving to "family conferences," we sent a message loud and clear: Every family, in whatever form it takes, is valued and respected in our school.

Changing the language was more than just a surface-level decision—it became a reflection of our deeper values. We aimed to create an environment where all families felt welcome, and in doing so, we built a stronger school community. As leaders, it’s crucial that we look beyond tradition and embrace changes that support the evolving needs of our students. After all, if it’s what’s best for kids, isn’t that what matters most?

Wishing you the VERY BEST of luck with your family conferences! It's so true that it takes a village to raise a child, and these moments are a fantastic way to strengthen those bonds. Make sure families feel welcomed and included; it's all about creating a sense of belonging in our school community!

You ROCK!

Big Love,

Leigh